Profoundly bad. Nice to see that producer/director/actor/stuntman/titler Sampson was able to include all his favorite songs by getting cover bands to record them. For fun, check out the astroturf reviews for this over at imdb.

The slow parts are excruciatingly slow. The CG scenery is grand and interesting, the CG everything else is not. About 20 minutes too long.

There is a laugh or two, but it’s not worth the time.

Exceptionally poor. Not campy, classic, retro, or anything positive. Just poor.

Decent thriller with a bothersome ending (i.e., exactly like “Unknown”). Kudos for making efficient use of communications technology, while its ubiquity in modern society has placed many obstacles in the way of a decent mystery thriller.

Slick and vacuous.

Great-looking.

“Twister 2: This One Sucks”

Middling young person movie ruined by surreptitious cam distractions.

No, “Stand By Me” would not have been better with aliens.